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You see them in isolation rooms. They are usually referred to as Fake Stethoscopes. They are made by Fake Incorporated. Sometimes they are referred to as "Dim Stethoscopes." It's because you can't hear lung sounds for crap. So, you find yourself just writing or clicking, "Diminished." And sometimes you don't even bother using it. I mean, it's been in the same room as a MRSA patient for a week now. And the lung sounds have been the same since the patient arrived. And so you just scan the patient. You start the treatment. And you just (if no one is looking, that is) go right to charting. And, without even touching the Dim stethoscope, you click: "Diminished." There is one exception. If the patient is wet. That's the exception. Because, if that's why the doctor ordered it, it's mainly because of that audible cardiac wheeze . You don't need a stethoscope to here it. So, you can then click on "Wheeze" So, that's you...

You cannot vote on science. Science either is or is not. So a consensus is not science. In 2010, The CDC's Advisory Committee On Immunization Practice voted. They voted that everyone over the age of 6 months should be vaccinated against the flu. (1) Personally, I'm in favor of the flu vaccination. But, I will admit this is my opinion and not science. It is not science that the flu vaccine will prevent you from getting the flu. In fact, the flu vaccine, in the years researchers are the most accurate at guessing what viruses will be in the air in a given season, is only 40-60% accurate. (2) This is because there are many, many, many different flu viruses. It's also because the flu virus can mutate. So, even if you are vaccinated against the H1N1 influenza A virus, you can still get the H1N1 virus. This happened in 2009. The H1N1 flu virus is one of the most popular flu viruses. You are vaccinated against it every time you get a flu vaccine. But, in 2009, the virus mutated as ...

Those dog gone suckers just won't leave me alone. My health insurance company, that is. They called me for the 4th time to talk to me about talking to a pharmacist to review my medicine. I actually tried to be nice this time. So, I just said, "Why do I need it?" To be honest, I think me asking this threw the person off her script. She didn't know what to say. After a long pause, I said, "I already talk to my doctor about my medicine. Why do I need to talk to a pharmacist." "Well," she said, "It's nice just to have your medicine reviewed by a second person." I said, "Why would I need that. Like I have said every other time someone has told me I need to review my medicine. I already review my medicine with my doctor. I'm also a respiratory therapist. What more is there for me to gain?" Once again I threw her off script. And, allow me to add again that I tried to be very pleasant with my tone. I was a nice boy. I was hoping...

I usually stay pretty cool about things. But, I'm getting rather annoyed that insurance companies have more control now than doctor's do. I'm just beside myself at how annoyed I am about this. For starters, my pharmacist insists he needs to sit down with me and review my medicine. The past two years I have adamantly resisted this. I don't need to review my medicine. It's something I do with my doctor when needed. Why would I need to sit down with my pharmacist so he can tell me what I already know. Besides the fact I'm a respiratory therapist who is a writer who specializes in asthma. Like, I read up on asthma every day. Asthma is my specialty. Not saying I know it all, but I certainly don't need to be lectured by my pharmacist. So, today I get a call from my insurance company. It's a call I have not taken until today. But, considering they are persistent and keep calling frequently, I finally took the call today. And, lo and behold, a nice lady is on th...

RT Boss displaying new goggles. You heard it here first. The Federal Agency for Efficiency (FAKE) has created a new regulation requiring goggles. They must be worn by employers who are on the clock when reading magazines. I was kind of confused when I learned of this policy. It came down to me via the respiratory care manager at Shoreline Medical Center. He said he was required to write a hospital policy for Goggle Management. I inquired as to why this policy was created. He said it passed the FAKE board by a vote of 8-1. The policy is expected to prevent wisdom from magazines from splattering off the pages of said magazines and offering wisdom to readers. The goal here is to prevent workers from getting smarter. If they remain dumb, it's easier for said individuals to become brainwashed by top management officials. Ditto for government officials. I called Mike Wisdom, the chair of the Fake Committee. He said "This is just the beginning. You can basically call this the test ph...

The following is a guest article by Sarah Cummings. By Sarah Cummings Guest Writer to RT Cave Unless you have to live with asthma, it probably won’t really occur to you that the condition which has a profound effect on the respiratory system of the body can result in difficulty finding sound slumber on a regular basis. It’s not until you think about it that this actually makes sense and becomes clear. Wheezing , coughing, and feeling breathless, are all symptoms that can create a hostile environment for mind and body to relax and settle in for a good night’s sleep. What’s more, there are also people who can be diagnosed with a condition known as night-time (nocturnal) asthma . This has the potential to make asthmatic symptoms even more severe in the night-time. What happens to our breathing at night? When you head into the night, particularly as bedtime approaches, changes occur in conjunction with your ‘body clock’ or natural circadian rhythm. For those who are healthy, these nig...